selfless

i think today was one of my most selfless days.

usually im going and going trying to please myself. I'm always worried what i need, if im content, if im in a good mood or not. But today was different.

I watched the movie "United 93" today, for the second time. the first time i saw this movie, i was 10, and didnt get it at all. Today, i watched it all alone in my room, in the dark. The movie is about the passengers on the airline united 93 that took back over the plane after the terrorists hijacked it, and flew it into the ground before it could reach its destination. I must say, that movie has a special place in my heart. I cried and cried not because i was thinking about how scary it would be for myself in that situation, but because of how scary it had to be for them, how they had to say goodbye to their families, how courageous they were. I want to be as selfless and fearless as those people that charged the terrorists, took the plane and gave their lives to protect the capital. I wish that everyday, i could have that fearlessness and selflessness to forget my needs, accomplish what i need to do, and help the world be a better place. Yes, ourselves are important, but i realized that we should do the right thing for everyone else first.

The world needs more brave people. We need more fearlessness. We need to raise our voices to injustice. We need to fight in what we believe in. We are all on the same team. In the moive, strangers came together to save their country. Brave souls exist. Find yours, it shouldnt only come out when you're in danger.

We can take a lot from those events on 9/11.

Be brave. Be fearless.

Performance

tonight was our choir concert at the junior high. I got to perform with my friends Savanna, Kaylee, Sarah and Brie, and i got to watch my best friend Madi sing in her all girl choir. (rocked butt, by the way)

It went well, for sopranos i think. I could only ear us, i dont know how we sounded as a whole. We got to wear super rad robes,

which made us look like wizards. Savanna and i were casting spells on each other during rehearsal. The robes are too much fun. Plus three inch heels.

I felt alive singing up the risers.

Such a good night.

Invisible

"And i just wanna show you, she dont even know you, she's never gonna love you like i want to , and you just see right through me, but if you only knew me, we could be a beautiful, miracle, unbelievable, instead of just invisible."

It hurts me when i see someone love another person so much, and that person just looks right over it. These people are so out of tune from love. They almost have love handed to them, and they just ignore it. they want someone else, they always want something more. the person falling head over heels for them is never enough.

If these people only stopped to look at the people that love them so much, this world would be a better place.

It hurts me to see many of friends love someone, and the people they love just turn away. they dont even pay attention to the girls that will hike miles with blistered feet just to see them, or stand out in the cold to talk to them. They dont see the girls that really, truly are beautiful.

they go for the girls that play them, and play them hard. they dont know that these girls pay the same special attention to about 20 other guys. They use them and talk to sweet to them, but really, they're dying for some other boy. in the end we have hurt boys, and hurt girls. and we're just all hurting each other. We need to give the people that may not be our first choice a chance.

these poor boys are blinded to see the girls that really like them. the girls that talk about them with their girlfriends at sleepovers. that take extra time in the morning to look pretty just for them. that sing every love song thinking of them. nope, these poor boys just take the obvious.

Everyone needs to slow down. The most amazing and lovable people are never popular. i cant name one famous person who was popular in school. the most amazing people are in my seminary class, most of them i wouldn't have ever talked to before, and im so glad i did. Because they are my brothers and sisters now. The person im most thankful for giving a chance is my best friends madi. We weren't friends before 6th grade, and i wasn't planning on being friends. but i talked to her and gave her a chance. turns out she is one of the most beautiful, intelligent people i know. i love her more than she knows, i dont where i would be without her, she has helped through so much. she is so interesting. she keeps me laughing and thinking and loving.

Its always the underdogs that have a better story. the person in the corner that you never wanted to be friends with, thats the person you need to talk to. they have something you're missing.

not that people cant work their way to the top, like a lot of people do, but we already pay too much attention to the poeple at the top. why not look down for a change?

Ive hurt too much wanting people to love me, I dont want the same for my friends. Ive cried adn tried to change myself and wanted them so badly, i couldnt think of anything else. Please, stop looking over us. We are better than you think, and we are amazing. Start talking to someone, you might find a companion for life.